Self-discovery

I feel like I am trying to make this effort to be on this journey of self-discovery.  I am reading books, thinking about what I want and how to get it, trying to make peace with the past, and trying to find ways to be a better me.  It's not an easy thing by any means and last week I let stress get the best of me.  Some things have jumped out at me lately:
-Matthew Hussey said "If you are nervous to the point of speechlessness around him, what are you overvaluing about him and undervaluing about yourself?"  How many times do I forget that I put others on pedestals they don't deserve to be on while I forget my own worth?
-I was also reminded of this tonight while I have been texting a guy who doesn't seem to hide the fact that he is interested.  And as my wise friend Julie pointed out, I shouldn't have to guess if a guy is interested or not, I should know.  This guy reminded me tonight "you have all the leverage"  My response was "I do have the leverage don't I?"  I literally forget that I have value and what I have to offer.  I start to put too much emphasis on other people and what they have to offer I forget what I have to offer.
-tonight during boot camp we worked out outside.  We skipped for 3 mins. and I felt like such a kid again I giggled most of the time.  Then when we were doing a Pilates bridge we were on our backs on our mats and had to hold a medicine ball up with our thighs for two mins. We all were laying there and one girl said "wow this is so relaxing" and I completely agreed.  I had already been staring at the sky thinking I was speechless. I forgot how awesome just looking up at the sky was and how little it made me feel.  There is something about staring at the sky that made everything else, all the worries and stress just disappear.  It was an awesome moment.  I can't remember the last time I just looked up at the sky.      It was easily the best workout so far.  It didn't feel like a workout. When she told us it was time to stretch we all said "wait, that's it?" We all felt refreshed.  It was so cool.  We all agreed we were happy we had our little group of 3 and we all click so well.
-Probably one of the biggest things I am working on is forgiving myself.  I feel like I say or do some stupid crap. A lot.  So when I do I tend to dwell on it and beat myself up.  I am trying to let myself say "ok you said it, don't say it again, move on" and forget it.  I don't remember stupid stuff other people say so why do I think other people dwell on my bad moments instead of my good ones?
- I have found some great quotes lately.  "I have reached a point in my life where I feel it is no longer necessary to try to impress anyone.  If they like me the way I am, good. And if they don't its their loss."  Need to live by this because too often I worry what others think, but I am getting over it.
-"you have to be willing to get happy about nothing."  This weekend I rediscovered the joy in some little things, like meeting a friend for breakfast and running at Stephens Lake.  I am so grateful for such amazing friends.
-"Be positive, patient, and persistent."
-and possibly my favorite quote I stumbled on this week "the highest form of human intelligence is to observe yourself without judgement."